Death by Exercise

When I used to go to Bally's, I would occasionally see an ambulance coming to rescue some poor person who overdid it. On those occasions, I would think to myself how idiotic it was to exercise to the point of utter exhaustion and even past that.

Then I started doing Crossfit. Now, every time I do a workout, I feel like I'm about to die. My lungs are still burning, and I finished 15 minutes ago. I don't think I've ever sweat so bad in my own living room.

Burpies are a creation of the devil. I think somewhere in hell, people who did unusually heinous deeds are forced to do burpies for all eternity. What's that, you don't know what burpies are?

A single burpie consists of the following:

1. Stand straight up
2. Drop to the floor, flinging your feet behind you into a push-up position
3. Do that push-up
4. Once you're in the "up" position, jump your feet into your chest
5. Stand up, flinging your arms above your head

There's not a single part of your body that won't be in agony after your 4th burpie.

Today, burpies were combined with walking lunges. Tomorrow I'm going to be in a world of pain.

Tomorrow is also my second judgement day. Once again I am nervous. Very nervous. A friend told me I may start gaining weight due to the muscle that I'm putting on. I don't want to put on weight. Lets hope that doesn't happen.